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In my case a few things. First off, becoming a dad Darth Vader Best Dad in the Galaxy shirt usually means being part of the childbirth and raising them right away. For me as a step-dad, the kids were 6 and 7 when I met them. They both liked me well enough but the younger one was a tad more stand-offish. I did get the “You’re not my dad” line quite a few times during puberty and my response was to agree and then simply state that though not their biological father, I was still the person married to their mom and together with her made sure they had food, clothes, a roof over their head and under that roof there were certain rules to be followed.
After Puberty the youngest realized that I had been Darth Vader Best Dad in the Galaxy shirt more of a dad than the biological dad, with the ups and downs and even further downs I was always there for support. It was only after puberty that I changed from my name to. The older one was more relaxed I guess, I was almost right away and got switched to my name when he became an adult. I am proud of both of them and consider myself their father. I dislike it when in official situations I ~have~ to be called step-father. And by now, both have kids of their own, one of them is a step-dad of his own and so I have become step-step-Gramps which sounds like the rhythm to a waltz). In my opinion. A father is not necessarily the one who contributed the sperm, but the one who steps up to the plate to rais the kids.